Whew! We are finally out of Eclipse season and everything is just looking pretty bright this May, not just with the lunations, but with the astrology in general.

In this episode, Hollis and Kimmy continue the Relationship Series by discussing the art of compromise. They’ll get into the ways in which we can navigate compromise without harboring resentment, and the importance of upholding integrity, values, and self confidence in the face of compromise. They offer insights and practical tips for finding a balance that works for both you and your relationships.

Hollis and Kimmy challenge our narratives around commitment by reframing our commitments as a practice in courage, empowering individuals to navigate their relationships and placements in the world with clarity and authenticity.

This journal shares the transcript of the fourth installment of the Lunar Series. This month, Hollis explores the supercharged lunations of April 2024. We begin with a New Moon Eclipse at 19° of Aries on April 8th, followed by a Full Moon at 4° of Scorpio on April 23rd. Both events are ruled by the fiery planet, Mars, symbolizing assertion, directness, aggression, and competition.

In this transcript, Hollis leads a candid exploration of pleasure, from quick dopamine hits to the weight of guilt, to the deeper, more heart-felt experiences of pleasure.

Welcome to eclipse season friends! This journal shares a transcript of the third episode in our Lunar Series. In preparation for our first eclipse of 2024, we'll explore the significance of eclipses, their disruptive nature, and how they can propel us onto unexpected paths.

In this transcript, Hollis and Kimmy delve into safety, comfort, and ownership as distinct pillars of the home experience. They discuss strategies for nurturing a stable foundation within, even amid life’s transitions, offering a few fun tools valuable to finding home within ourselves and our environments.

Join us as we chart these transits, and explore the passage of time via our second most important luminary - the moon! Our first lunation of this month is a New Moon in Aquarius followed by a Full Moon in Virgo.

This journal shares the transcript of Episode 011 of The Designed Life Podcast. In this episode, Hollis explores the nuances of identifying, understanding, and cultivating security in relationships, whether it be a one-on-one connection, a group setting, or even our relationship to self.

This journal is a transcription from our new Lunar Series! Join us as we chart these transits, and explore the passage of time via our second most important luminary - the moon! Our first lunation of this month is a New Moon in Capricorn followed by a Full Moon in Leo.

This journal shares a transcript of the conversation between Hollis and Kimmy as they discuss how we can approach intention setting in the new year with a sense of excitement, exuberance and clarity without compromising our well-being.

This journal shares the transcript of the conversation between Hollis and Kimmy, as they discuss tools beneficial to finding a sense of center during the holiday season or in times of high stress. Coming back to our center allows us to come back to the present moment, hold ourselves with grace, and ground ourselves in gratitude.

This journal shares the transcript of the conversation between Hollis and her assistant, Kimmy Anne Dunn, as they answer a question from the TDL Community: How Do I Make Decisions?

This journal shares an abridged transcript of the conversation between Hollis and her assistant, Kimmy Anne Dunn, as they answer a question from the TDL Community: How Do I Quit Quitting? In their conversation they explore the habit building process and the difference between linear and circular mindsets when building habits or practices. By clarifying our ‘why’, taking it slow, and finding resilience, we can quit the quitting cycle and better support ourselves in the motivation process. 

I think about this phrase now, as an adult, and how hard it is to grasp. It implies that our true selves are hidden somewhere in the world, waiting to be discovered. And, yes, there is some truth to this. However, I believe the path to self-discovery isn't always about external exploration; it's often an internal journey of shedding layers imposed by society and others, and uncovering our essential, core selves.

From a very young age, we're indoctrinated into a system that emphasizes the purpose of productivity. The purpose of doing the work now to be able to get the job, the career or the lifestyle that we want in the future. Whether it be homework, studying, extracurriculars – all of it has to serve the larger purpose. And so, then our sense of purpose becomes intertwined with what we do for a living and our feelings of self-worth. So, now, your pleasure has to also somehow feed your work and your overarching sense of purpose in this lifetime. 

When we're in relationship with another person, we end up showing more of ourselves than we would just on our own, especially when we're in really close partnerships where there may be a little more of the expectation to be vulnerable. What inevitably ends up happening when we reach these levels of intimacy with another person is that we find things about ourselves or about the other person that rub us a certain way.

Relationships are absolutely one of my favorite aspects of being human. It is, of course, one of the main aspects of being human because we are social creatures and are nothing without each other. If anything, COVID showed us that we cannot exist without one another and that we are all 100% interdependent and connected, whether we like it or not. 

Here at Life Design, we love to talk about the light and airy subjects of expansion and inspiration and what motivates us. What lights us up and what gets us feeling really good in our bodies. That said, it is really important that we stop every once in a while and look at the more difficult emotions, such as shame or guilt or jealousy or anger. You know, the ones that make us feel a little itchy and scratchy inside. The ones that kind of stir us up in some type of way. 

I remember seeing an acupuncturist at the time, and I told her about my emotional experience. She said that sometimes the universe shows us a glimpse of what we want so that we can build it for ourselves with a strong foundation. I took that to heart and to this day, when I'm feeling really stuck, I remind myself of that particular trip and think about the qualities of that trip that I can bring into this moment now.

When I personally think of pleasure, I generally imagine it to be something intuitive. It’s less like a force of will and more like a listening and following through on a desire my body and heart are asking for. It’s an ease that allows us to feel like we’re moving at the right pace, at the right time. There’s a non-grasping, a non-attachment, just sheer enjoyment of what is. ‍It’s almost undefinable simply because words are too confining, and pleasure is not about structure or limitation or restriction. It’s about expansion, freedom, and uninhibited joy.

We can consider the process of healing similar to the process of growth - as a spiral. The first circle is the first layer of recovery and adjustment after the wounding. The second circle is a little lighter, a little higher, but asks us to honestly address another layer of what is no longer working, and what needs our care. As we spiral upwards we may come back around to the same things over and over from different perspectives to heal little by little.

Change is what makes us alive. It's what propels our internal rhythms, systems, and functions to operate in health and with vitality, consistently eliminating waste and absorbing and applying nourishment. It is the cycle of our breath. It's what allows the seasons to flow into one another, and for generations to evolve over the course of thousands of years. To embrace change is to embrace life, and isn't that what we're all being asked to do?

Motivation is an energy you can feel. The experience of the impetus is compelling, and sometimes inexplicable. It can almost feel as though we've been captured by something beyond us to move, speak, or act in a way that we didn't even think of. I firmly believe that so much of what we will do in the future has already been decided by what we're doing now, and every step we take sets up our future actions and reactions.

Boundaries are something we each have to learn for ourselves throughout our lifetime. As we grow, begin to individuate, and form more of our authentic identities, we discover where we end and where other people begin. Boundaries become an extension of expressing and implementing those edges of ourselves, and a key to creating a healthy understanding of who we are and how to meet our own needs.

Her moment of self-reflection hit me so strongly, and I found myself asking myself the same question – why don’t I do everything I love to do every day? This thought was quickly followed up with another question that flooded me with a different set of emotions - do I even know what the things are that I love to do?

There is something about this season - the season of settling back into routine, prepping for the chaos of the holidays, and the release of the activity of the summer that inspires an appreciation for the sensation of “home”. It is this time of year that impresses the fleeting quality of life and everything in it, and the depth and briefness of our most life-affirming act – the breath. It instills the importance of savoring before something is lost to us - perhaps forever. It can be so easy to get caught up in the wind, and to lose ourselves momentarily in the process, but if we still ourselves into the activity of the moment, we find something of an antidote to the impermanence of everything around us.

This relationship to ourselves that I’m describing is one that takes time, effort, is established by a consistent and honest inner dialogue and is fortified by the integrity of our actions and choices. It is a relationship where our internal world becomes configured in such a way that our external movements and choices are a direct reflection of our deep connection to our needs and desires. 

"Happiness is impermanent, but it can be renewed. You are also impermanent and also renewable, like your breath, like your steps. You are not something permanent experiencing something impermanent. You are something impermanent experiencing something impermanent." - Thich Nhat Hanh

I like to think of self-worth as a golden staff that aligns with the very core of our body. Made strong by our own recognition of our previously disowned parts and the experience of each of them as valuable. We have proven, through our choice of self-reclamation, that all of who we are is worthy, from the inside out.‍As our parts become more integrated, we naturally share more of ourselves in our communities. We learn with who and in what situations we'll be appreciated, and with who and in what situations we won't. This might mean that our social circles change, which is always scary and uncomfortable. Yet, the more we stay connected to who we are rather than removing some of our parts, the more we cultivate our self-worth. The more we stay whole in our social experiences, the more we say to ourselves “I am enough just as I am.” 

The process of uncovering who we are is a process of claiming our right to our own internal freedom. The freedom to know what we need and want, and to then act in alignment with those needs and wants. The freedom to live without doubt or self-judgment. The freedom to live with the peace of mind that we can trust ourselves, above anyone or anything else - because we know ourselves.

...what keeps us staying focused is our inner connection to what we want more than anything – what brings us a deep sense of accomplishment and, therefore, joy. That's what allows us to get into those moments of complete connectivity and flow, and what motivates us to keep going in the face of big obstacles. ↓